Okay Abhishek, you NEED to write more of such essays that are personal. I am always in such awe of your informative and well-researched posts but essays like these where I get to see more of your thought, feelings, and a bit of your journey? More of that please!
For me, the computer meant Jump Start video games and Paint at the age of 4-7, Barbie and dress up games on the internet between 8-12, and Facebook, Yahoo!Answers, and Omegle between 13-17. I worry for the early age I was exposed to stranger on the internet and I worry for the teenagers today. There are many beautiful things about the internet and social media but it’s also extremely potent in its impact and accessibility. We usually talk about accessibility in terms of us accessing these platforms but I primarily see social media as a way capitalism/companies access us/our minds in ways we can never even imagine.
As for friends on social media? That feels oxymoronic. And you’re right, I too rather have a handful of friends around me than the illusion of friends based on how many followers and likes I receive.
Thanks for the encouragement Hargun. You are too kind. Really enjoyed reading that comment. The nature of your early use is a bit different from my early use. I found Omegle strange and intimidating. I wish I explored social simulation video games a bit more. I was addicted to this computer game called Neopets for a bit. And yes, it is scary how much of our data and personal information is being used by these platforms to sell us products or services we may or may not want to buy. Privacy is a huge concern with these social media tools!
Such a wonderful personal essay Abhishek. Agree with and sort of experienced most things you've mentioned. Orkut part was so nostalgic. I have a love hate relationship with social media tbh. Social media has led to a couple of meaningful relationships and also exposure to some wonderful people who I wouldn't have possible met otherwise. Both of which have added immensely added to my life. I've also found personal and professional interest of styling and photography which I might have not found otherwise. Having said that I do face the brunt of the other side aswell, lately especially I've been feeling social media fatigue a lot. The serious mental exhaustion purely from consuming, followed by it's addictive nature (by design) making it so hard to stop scrolling.
Completely resonate with the thought of personal life being private, that people on the internet don't have access too, only your inner circle does.
Thanks for sharing that Forum. Was really curious about your thoughts as we may have experienced some of the same things growing up. Reading what you wrote made me realize that I’m not alone in feeling that way about social media. I loved your points about the many benefits of these tools. It can be a really powerful professional learning tool for the creative fields in general. I think it is also helpful to find niche communities of interests that may not always be accessible in your neighbourhood or city. It can give you a sense of belonging in that regard. Thanks for reading this and leaving this comment here.
In TV Era , the content was categorised, children usually stick to cartoon , mothers and teens maybe a serial or show , fathers news channel, movies -usually whole family.
There was limitations, one episode a day with weekends special or weekend breaks.
But nowadays same short content is being consumed by children (they know the trending memes, trending music, they are content creators now) , professionals, teens , adults everyone is getting the same content and same unlimited screen time .
The most adverse effect is seen on lonely senior citizens (who crave to talk , but everyone has their devices) , children (given tabs , but hardly every child is guided and under parental control), growing teens (lost their innocence, using abusive language, lost originality of thoughts, their personalities are not shaped but influenced by influencers), adults (conforming to luxurious lifestyle shown by influencers, focus on spending on trendy items not savings) .
Now the Growing Concern -- Online study batches- children not even opening textbooks and getting 90+ marks , their apps , videos designed in a way - "welcome students you don't even need to open book watch this - gauranteed 100 marks"
Textbooks lost importance.
Children are losing Attention span , ability to read a textbook, they have overly depended on audio visual content. The hate text now. Reading a page , they would yawn. They fell into the game of marketing, if they leave this path , they will develop FOMO (Fear of missing out).
ChatGPT - ready to do everything, paralysing us cognitively . Always validates all your emotions, very soft manipulation. Never says you may be wrong , trained to say it is okay to feel this way.... Validates your overthinking.
Consumers treating it as an alternative of counselor, therapist or friend . (Dangerous for younger users)
Keeping privacy as priority, limitations, and boundaries created in a healthier way will help us in wise use of social media. Social Media is a boon if used in a right way .
You made so many relevant and important points in your comment. I remember having a conversation with my mother and some relatives. They told me that growing up in India they had access to very few audio visual experiences. Before liberalization there was just one or two entertainment channels on tv and it was the same for the radio. They spent a lot of their free time after school playing with friends in neighbourhood spaces. They did enjoy the occasional weekend movie that would be played at a specific time on Sunday.
I really worry about the reduction in reading and the dependence on ChatGPT and other A.I. tools. Unfortunately I don't think there is any shortcut and quick fix to develop young readers. Access to lots of books and adults that read can be a stimulant. But you do need to do the hard work of reading through a lot of books before it become a habit. The incentive to do that has gone down because people often just look up summaries of books on the Internet now. I know friends that do that for both non fiction and fiction too.
Both millennials and gen-z will face the brunt of this. I am worried we will slowly lose the ability to critically analyze data and think from a first principles perspective. Textbooks allow you to do that really well thought a lot of textbooks are poorly written.
Privacy and over dependence is something I think we will struggle with for a long time as most people don't have the technical skills to understand how their data is being used by the algorithms.
Also more recently I realized that I am facing a lot of media fatigue because I am consuming too much media without enough time to process and reflect on the same. I am also numbing myself to difficult emotions because of how constant exposure desensitizes you slowly.
Lots to think about after reading your comment. Thank you for sharing your thoughts.
Social media was supposed to connect us to our far off friends or maybe the close ones who aren't near us right now. But it evolved to something else which is not really serving the original purpose it was meant to do. But here we are, debating about it on another social media platform!
This was a well written piece.
Also, based on the research that humans can form only 150 meaningful connections, are you implying that guests list in a wedding should be limited to 150 folks from each side? 😂
Thanks Abhishek. Haha I think the two most overwhelmed people at the wedding are the bride and groom. They have to shake all these hands. So the decision on how many people to invite should really be correlated to the natural in born ability of the couple to smile and shake hands. But I’m curious Abhishek. Have you seen of the same habits come up for you in daily social interactions? Like how have things changed for you since you first started using social media?
First read of Sunday. What a roller coaster ride. So many things to relate to. And it's quite amazing to see where you are right now. "Welcome to wherever you are".
I'm yet to watch the Ted Talk, will do so a bit later.
It's been over a year since I left Instagram. And more than 5 years since I left facebook. Don't miss both that much. Glad to have found Substack.
Thank you for those screenshots of Orkut. Nostalgia triggered. I'm still in touch with a few friends I've made there. One especially, a good friend for 17 long years also currently my life partner.
Ah. Thanks for sharing that Amit. I think social media has so many positive stories and benefits too. It does truly connect people if used in the right manner. I was worried that I wasn't able to highlight some of the benefits of the same. But your comments about meeting your wife on Orkut was so special for me as a writer. I have nurtured some close friendships on social media. But they were far and few in between. It is a double edged sword for me. As a fellow Orkut user what led to your decision to get off Instagram and Facebook? Did you miss it in the long run? How did it change how you related to your social community and inner circle?
Oh and that TED talk did partly inspire this essay. This one is really good to. It is by a media researcher who studies how technology affects social behaviour. It is a bit old but very relevant. Her name is Sherry Turkle.
I guess, we as humans, became too woke/choosy. With Instagram or FB you think you belong somewhere but it's all in your head. There is a sense of community but it lacks the communication. There seems to be a feeling of always staying in touch, yet you're distant. You think you know someone too well, but let's be honest here. We only know that part of someone they wish to share with you. So, that's that. If you truly understand the dynamics, every person is a paradox. Be in on insta/fb or in real life. The latter is much more real. However, we chose the former/the real since we only get to see the choicest parts. After leaving both, I feel my sense of grounding is returning slowly. With real people, you tend to see both.
Okay Abhishek, you NEED to write more of such essays that are personal. I am always in such awe of your informative and well-researched posts but essays like these where I get to see more of your thought, feelings, and a bit of your journey? More of that please!
For me, the computer meant Jump Start video games and Paint at the age of 4-7, Barbie and dress up games on the internet between 8-12, and Facebook, Yahoo!Answers, and Omegle between 13-17. I worry for the early age I was exposed to stranger on the internet and I worry for the teenagers today. There are many beautiful things about the internet and social media but it’s also extremely potent in its impact and accessibility. We usually talk about accessibility in terms of us accessing these platforms but I primarily see social media as a way capitalism/companies access us/our minds in ways we can never even imagine.
As for friends on social media? That feels oxymoronic. And you’re right, I too rather have a handful of friends around me than the illusion of friends based on how many followers and likes I receive.
Thanks for the encouragement Hargun. You are too kind. Really enjoyed reading that comment. The nature of your early use is a bit different from my early use. I found Omegle strange and intimidating. I wish I explored social simulation video games a bit more. I was addicted to this computer game called Neopets for a bit. And yes, it is scary how much of our data and personal information is being used by these platforms to sell us products or services we may or may not want to buy. Privacy is a huge concern with these social media tools!
Such a wonderful personal essay Abhishek. Agree with and sort of experienced most things you've mentioned. Orkut part was so nostalgic. I have a love hate relationship with social media tbh. Social media has led to a couple of meaningful relationships and also exposure to some wonderful people who I wouldn't have possible met otherwise. Both of which have added immensely added to my life. I've also found personal and professional interest of styling and photography which I might have not found otherwise. Having said that I do face the brunt of the other side aswell, lately especially I've been feeling social media fatigue a lot. The serious mental exhaustion purely from consuming, followed by it's addictive nature (by design) making it so hard to stop scrolling.
Completely resonate with the thought of personal life being private, that people on the internet don't have access too, only your inner circle does.
Thanks for sharing that Forum. Was really curious about your thoughts as we may have experienced some of the same things growing up. Reading what you wrote made me realize that I’m not alone in feeling that way about social media. I loved your points about the many benefits of these tools. It can be a really powerful professional learning tool for the creative fields in general. I think it is also helpful to find niche communities of interests that may not always be accessible in your neighbourhood or city. It can give you a sense of belonging in that regard. Thanks for reading this and leaving this comment here.
Very well written
In TV Era , the content was categorised, children usually stick to cartoon , mothers and teens maybe a serial or show , fathers news channel, movies -usually whole family.
There was limitations, one episode a day with weekends special or weekend breaks.
But nowadays same short content is being consumed by children (they know the trending memes, trending music, they are content creators now) , professionals, teens , adults everyone is getting the same content and same unlimited screen time .
The most adverse effect is seen on lonely senior citizens (who crave to talk , but everyone has their devices) , children (given tabs , but hardly every child is guided and under parental control), growing teens (lost their innocence, using abusive language, lost originality of thoughts, their personalities are not shaped but influenced by influencers), adults (conforming to luxurious lifestyle shown by influencers, focus on spending on trendy items not savings) .
Now the Growing Concern -- Online study batches- children not even opening textbooks and getting 90+ marks , their apps , videos designed in a way - "welcome students you don't even need to open book watch this - gauranteed 100 marks"
Textbooks lost importance.
Children are losing Attention span , ability to read a textbook, they have overly depended on audio visual content. The hate text now. Reading a page , they would yawn. They fell into the game of marketing, if they leave this path , they will develop FOMO (Fear of missing out).
ChatGPT - ready to do everything, paralysing us cognitively . Always validates all your emotions, very soft manipulation. Never says you may be wrong , trained to say it is okay to feel this way.... Validates your overthinking.
Consumers treating it as an alternative of counselor, therapist or friend . (Dangerous for younger users)
Keeping privacy as priority, limitations, and boundaries created in a healthier way will help us in wise use of social media. Social Media is a boon if used in a right way .
Hi,
You made so many relevant and important points in your comment. I remember having a conversation with my mother and some relatives. They told me that growing up in India they had access to very few audio visual experiences. Before liberalization there was just one or two entertainment channels on tv and it was the same for the radio. They spent a lot of their free time after school playing with friends in neighbourhood spaces. They did enjoy the occasional weekend movie that would be played at a specific time on Sunday.
I really worry about the reduction in reading and the dependence on ChatGPT and other A.I. tools. Unfortunately I don't think there is any shortcut and quick fix to develop young readers. Access to lots of books and adults that read can be a stimulant. But you do need to do the hard work of reading through a lot of books before it become a habit. The incentive to do that has gone down because people often just look up summaries of books on the Internet now. I know friends that do that for both non fiction and fiction too.
Both millennials and gen-z will face the brunt of this. I am worried we will slowly lose the ability to critically analyze data and think from a first principles perspective. Textbooks allow you to do that really well thought a lot of textbooks are poorly written.
Privacy and over dependence is something I think we will struggle with for a long time as most people don't have the technical skills to understand how their data is being used by the algorithms.
Also more recently I realized that I am facing a lot of media fatigue because I am consuming too much media without enough time to process and reflect on the same. I am also numbing myself to difficult emotions because of how constant exposure desensitizes you slowly.
Lots to think about after reading your comment. Thank you for sharing your thoughts.
Abhishek
Very well written bhai!
Social media was supposed to connect us to our far off friends or maybe the close ones who aren't near us right now. But it evolved to something else which is not really serving the original purpose it was meant to do. But here we are, debating about it on another social media platform!
This was a well written piece.
Also, based on the research that humans can form only 150 meaningful connections, are you implying that guests list in a wedding should be limited to 150 folks from each side? 😂
Thanks Abhishek. Haha I think the two most overwhelmed people at the wedding are the bride and groom. They have to shake all these hands. So the decision on how many people to invite should really be correlated to the natural in born ability of the couple to smile and shake hands. But I’m curious Abhishek. Have you seen of the same habits come up for you in daily social interactions? Like how have things changed for you since you first started using social media?
First read of Sunday. What a roller coaster ride. So many things to relate to. And it's quite amazing to see where you are right now. "Welcome to wherever you are".
I'm yet to watch the Ted Talk, will do so a bit later.
It's been over a year since I left Instagram. And more than 5 years since I left facebook. Don't miss both that much. Glad to have found Substack.
Thank you for those screenshots of Orkut. Nostalgia triggered. I'm still in touch with a few friends I've made there. One especially, a good friend for 17 long years also currently my life partner.
Keep writing. Keep sharing.
Ah. Thanks for sharing that Amit. I think social media has so many positive stories and benefits too. It does truly connect people if used in the right manner. I was worried that I wasn't able to highlight some of the benefits of the same. But your comments about meeting your wife on Orkut was so special for me as a writer. I have nurtured some close friendships on social media. But they were far and few in between. It is a double edged sword for me. As a fellow Orkut user what led to your decision to get off Instagram and Facebook? Did you miss it in the long run? How did it change how you related to your social community and inner circle?
Oh and that TED talk did partly inspire this essay. This one is really good to. It is by a media researcher who studies how technology affects social behaviour. It is a bit old but very relevant. Her name is Sherry Turkle.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t7Xr3AsBEK4
I guess, we as humans, became too woke/choosy. With Instagram or FB you think you belong somewhere but it's all in your head. There is a sense of community but it lacks the communication. There seems to be a feeling of always staying in touch, yet you're distant. You think you know someone too well, but let's be honest here. We only know that part of someone they wish to share with you. So, that's that. If you truly understand the dynamics, every person is a paradox. Be in on insta/fb or in real life. The latter is much more real. However, we chose the former/the real since we only get to see the choicest parts. After leaving both, I feel my sense of grounding is returning slowly. With real people, you tend to see both.
*former - the virtual
** be it
Unable to edit the comment. Sorry for the typo.